Leaking from my brain
Mar. 4th, 2026 11:12 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
thatsjustjenna I'm all over the place tonight. I have been at home for the past two days with whatever stomach hell my new GLP-1 shot dosage is called. It was two days of misery- and I am finally feeling better although still not great. I did eat real food today- so that was a plus.
I felt guilty for losing two days to somewhat self-inflicted sickness. I didn't do work or homework- and I definitely didn't sleep. I think I got a cumulative total of six hours of sleep both nights.
After being cooped up for 48 hours I sat outside on the porch tonight with my mac and cheese and ginger ale. The weather was perfect, people were outside walking and generally enjoying themselves. It felt good to have the wind and sunlight on my face, even though my whole body was absolutely wrung out.
I wanted to do homework, I wanted to respond to work emails, I wanted to do a million chores, do some self-reflection, some fun reading, anything- but I told myself I needed to rest. I was so angry all day. Mom came over and helped with a few chores and that and her presence were wonderful. I was less angry while she was here and in a better state in general. After she left I realized I was angry about things I had no control over, and that a part of it was that I had not slept and was also hungry. So I laid in bed without the phone nearby for a few hours. I don't know if I slept at all, but I did rest, and that was good enough. Afterward I got up and made myself some mac and cheese for dinner. I figured I could hold that down. I managed to eat a plain bagel with butter earlier for breakfast and had held that down.
Some rest, food, and sunlight did wonders for my mood- imagine that? (She said sarcastically.) I texted with Heather for a bit, normally we hang out on Wednesdays to watch tv or movies, but we hadn't the past few weeks for various reasons. She was having to work from home extra tonight so we couldn't hang out. Which was fine. I put my phone down and Mowgli and I snuggled in the chair for a few hours. Mom called to say good night and see how I was feeling. We talked a bit, and it was good.
Now I've showered off the funk, moisturized everything and am about to go listen to music for a few minutes and try to fall asleep. I'm going in to work tomorrow, probably just for a half day though. I think I'll come home and work on homework for a few hours. I'm almost not looking forward to going back tomorrow because Ryan will probably come in at some point. I'm hoping that I can get to work early and leave before he comes in. I don't have the mental or physical strength to deal with him tomorrow. I was supposed to go to a regional director's meeting tomorrow in Appomattox, but that's not going to happen.
At least it's almost the end of the week. Friday will be a good day, I can get a lot of work done then. The sisters will be working the front desk so I know everything will be handled there, and I can finally get the checks out.
Then I will just do homework over the weekend and hopefully be in better shape next week.
I'm wanting to write a lot more, but I think I better stop here for the night. Sleepy time meds are kicking in! :)
I felt guilty for losing two days to somewhat self-inflicted sickness. I didn't do work or homework- and I definitely didn't sleep. I think I got a cumulative total of six hours of sleep both nights.
After being cooped up for 48 hours I sat outside on the porch tonight with my mac and cheese and ginger ale. The weather was perfect, people were outside walking and generally enjoying themselves. It felt good to have the wind and sunlight on my face, even though my whole body was absolutely wrung out.
I wanted to do homework, I wanted to respond to work emails, I wanted to do a million chores, do some self-reflection, some fun reading, anything- but I told myself I needed to rest. I was so angry all day. Mom came over and helped with a few chores and that and her presence were wonderful. I was less angry while she was here and in a better state in general. After she left I realized I was angry about things I had no control over, and that a part of it was that I had not slept and was also hungry. So I laid in bed without the phone nearby for a few hours. I don't know if I slept at all, but I did rest, and that was good enough. Afterward I got up and made myself some mac and cheese for dinner. I figured I could hold that down. I managed to eat a plain bagel with butter earlier for breakfast and had held that down.
Some rest, food, and sunlight did wonders for my mood- imagine that? (She said sarcastically.) I texted with Heather for a bit, normally we hang out on Wednesdays to watch tv or movies, but we hadn't the past few weeks for various reasons. She was having to work from home extra tonight so we couldn't hang out. Which was fine. I put my phone down and Mowgli and I snuggled in the chair for a few hours. Mom called to say good night and see how I was feeling. We talked a bit, and it was good.
Now I've showered off the funk, moisturized everything and am about to go listen to music for a few minutes and try to fall asleep. I'm going in to work tomorrow, probably just for a half day though. I think I'll come home and work on homework for a few hours. I'm almost not looking forward to going back tomorrow because Ryan will probably come in at some point. I'm hoping that I can get to work early and leave before he comes in. I don't have the mental or physical strength to deal with him tomorrow. I was supposed to go to a regional director's meeting tomorrow in Appomattox, but that's not going to happen.
At least it's almost the end of the week. Friday will be a good day, I can get a lot of work done then. The sisters will be working the front desk so I know everything will be handled there, and I can finally get the checks out.
Then I will just do homework over the weekend and hopefully be in better shape next week.
I'm wanting to write a lot more, but I think I better stop here for the night. Sleepy time meds are kicking in! :)